Betrayed.

I climbed back up, I fall back down.

Although it’s only 4 months since the whole saga started, It seems like an eternity to me.

And now I felt thoroughly betrayed. Betrayed by the one that I’ve put in so much blood and sweat.

And I can only look into the mirror and laugh at my stupidity.

“She’s already over you even before things ended. Loser!”

How can someone put up with such disgrace and humiliation? How can i even face others after what I’ve allowed to happened?

Do i deserve this kind of karma? What have I exactly done? Am I done paying my karma off? When will these cycle of misery and disappointment stop?

I have 1001 questions on my mind now. But it doesn’t matter anymore. I don’t need any answers anymore. I’m done searching for it.

Perhaps my sis-in-law was right, I didn’t love myself enough, and that’s why I’m letting others to trample on me like a doormat on a rainy day.

I’m only 27 years old, but it felt like I’ve lived for half a century in terms of relationship.

I’ve broken down. I’m crying now. Fuck.